As the song goes...........
there would be few of us that would argue
that creating successful relationships
is one of the biggest challenges we face.

The sad thing is that life can be even more challenging
when relationships end.

If you are experiencing emotional upset
REMEMBER your body is always present
but where is your mind?

As you know we can't change the past
just give it permission to stay where it belongs,
behind us.

The truth is ...
that your future is going to be somewhat different
to what you may have anticipated.

Just as futile ...
is casting your mind into the future
wondering what life
could have.....would have....should have been
had you stayed with your partner.

Most of the pain you feel will be growing pains
because you are transferring from one state of being
to another....IS NOT EASY

If you manage it, try to
stay in the present moment

Remember your new state of being
will be as good as the choices you make now.

Whether your breakup was hard or amicable,
extending compassion to your old friend
will help you both in the healing process.

Extract from a Sydney Morning Herald blog stuff....

Why do men love girls who already have boyfriends?
And why do women lust after taken men?
Why the heck does our ex suddenly become more appealing
once they find someone new?

And according to an anthropologist from Rutgers University,
Helen Fisher, there's an actual scientific explanation to it all;
a trait that is ingrained in our human psyche. Fisher explains
that levels of dopamine, the "pleasure" chemical in the brain, actually increases the longer it takes for a pleasure to be fulfilled.

In other words, according to Fisher's theory, the longer you have
to yearn for someone you can't have, the more pleasurable the whole experience becomes. (No wonder single women are so turned on by taken men.)

Yet for all you can't-have-'em-so-I-want-'em aficionados, don't despair. After a string of disappointing dates, loveless booty calls, toxic break-ups and Saturday nights in and alone, many begin to realise that it gets kind of boring lusting after someone out of your reach.

And that's when the lightening bolt hits, forcing you to wake up to the music ...

As the Rolling Stones once crooned:

You can't always get what you want.
But if you try sometimes
You just might find
You get what you need.

- More of Sam and the City